.Wednesday, July 30, 20088:30 AM
good morning to my blog xD.. I noe Im lame .. at times, we realli take things for granted >.< .. honestly speaking, I was realli touched that pst chee kiang called me yesterday to see how Im doing this days. although, u might think its just a phone call but it shows that he care (",)..
todays wednesday.. later gonna do things for myself.. gonna have some qt b4 I leave e hse.. think e power in us realli lie in noting else but our own prayer closet. its wat separate us from e world itself.
not too sure if tonight gonna have nights out anot.. but if got it will be good then I can go hm to chill n see my parents. let us not keep procrastinate n get things done ba. e more I get more frustrated, e harder my thinking will be. just gonna be positive from now onwards =)
write to here.. cya xD
.Tuesday, July 29, 20082:35 PM
hehe.. went hm just abit.. to bathe then going to sgh for my appt again.. pls oh God.. realli I need u so much in this situation.. Im realli like dunno wat to do, but I surrender all ^^..
will update more when I come back from my appt later.. tata
Im realli speechless. but my breaktru is REALLI near.. I oni gonna announce when its there =D.. nonetheless I just wanna thank those who kept me in prayer. ARIGATO to e max.. my specialist is realli very nice.. I will like to buy him a gift lor.. all tis while sia since feb 13 e 1st time I saw him in clinic H xD.. today I waited 2 1/2 hrs for him.. its worth e wait.. ><
then I went to makan my dinner..
counting down e days le =).. jy mark D:
.Sunday, July 27, 200811:30 PM
went out today like 12 ? reached church like 12.45 =/.. its late I noe.. definitely I will be earlier next wk .. tml gonna book in like 7am.. but my father gonna fetch me.. I still dunno how sia about my posting.. realli very frustrated about it.. but gabriel keep encouraging me =) realli in times of need, u need someone to keep u going on.. not forgettting holy spirit who keep encouraging us.
today sermon was realli good.. it did motivated me alot..
share abit of e sermon..
5 keys to finish e race of our life :
1. Know What Fills & Drains Your Tank
2. Understand The law of balance in life
3. Lead/Serve Out Of Rest
4. Find a lightning rod
5. Discipline Your Daily Devotions
Scripture
Observation about it
Application
Prayer
we need to cleanse ourself with e "SOAP" each n everyday of our christian life.
after svc, we went to makan at e nearby coffeeshop lor.. usual stuff.. gabriel power every sunday like not hungry de -.-".. he trying to be funny lor I think :x then I bo eat also la.. today I wear my 1st domanchi shirt. it was awesome ^^.. I will save so that every mth I can buy a new shirt :X.. very bold statement I make sia.. to be honest, Im will nv be satisfied of earning like 2k per mth when I started working.. I will realli like to make alot of money so that I can be a blessing to someone or to even e community itself. after "makan", me, gabriel, natalie went to jurong pt for arcade!!.. well to think I was so excited to play my fav game -kof maxium impact- then I got thrashed by one guy sia ._. after that we went to meet up wif thomas n gang to go pei jing 21st bdae party which is inbetween dover n buona vista ..
at e party, e food was good ^^.. I loved e mutton curry n e chilli crabs.. well e crabs caused me to be crappy xD.. cos I stained my new shirt T.T.. I went to wash it at e condo toilet lor.. then suddenly e rm become k session, lotsa singing n laughing xD.. I realli enjoyed myself alot .. gonna turn in now liao.. tata
.Saturday, July 26, 200811:05 PM
honestly speaking.. Im running away from reality.. how I wished I had nv been tru those 2 yrs.. its been a scar that I cant erase away.. How I wish life can be so simple like typing .. when u wanna cancel something u just press the <- backspace button.. N it will be like gone?.. how I wish I can just backspace my 2 yrs of shutting myself from pple n depression. Its something that realli haunts me now n then.. well its dam scary ok?
well, those 2 yrs are like hell to me.. I dunno y NOT even one come to give me a hand to pull me out of all tis crap.. not even my parents or sis.. everyday, I just went hm n shut myself in my rm.. I dunno how to face pple when I go aboard on train.. I just feeel so out of place when Im in a bustling place.. I feel so lost .. I asked myself n was keep reminded of this : (
The most painful thing one could feel? ) the ans ->
The feeling that you are not needed by anyone in this world.when someone who accepts you from the bottom of their heart appears, That person should become the most important to you.Labels: A night that sadness fills the chills of the air
.Friday, July 25, 200812:15 PM
now at hm slacking xD.. e feeling at hm is shiok ^^..
my gundam seed ringtone lyrics :
We were together that much
And yet the dusk is already of a different color
The all-present kindess only makes me more distant from you
The heart you abandoned does nothing but wander
If you call that embarassment "living"
You can close your eyes beneath the cold winter sky
We were together that much
And yet the dusk is already of a different color
At least underneath this moonlight
Let us rest in silence
quote of the day : "What is it that you must fight against?" "_
.Tuesday, July 22, 200811:55 PM
tired .. lolx while blogging this.. Im now chilling at e comfort of my room typing this entry out.. well, today helping out was good ba.. geee.. lunch was pizzahut again! one slice of e pizza (it seems much bigger though) :X then 3 spicy drumlets n 2 garlic bread.. its same stuff as last wk.. lolx.. then eat liao.. dam full .. cos for morning I had long john silver e big fish meal at 9 plus -.-.. lunch was like 12? then after eating lunch, MORE chilling..
life is getting like wasted away lor.. tats how I find it.. I could be doing more fruitful things like drawing??? my sketching is improving alot ^^ .. I still rem last time my sketching was realli good.. think realli need more practice ba =).. later need to book in like 10.. gonna sleep pretty soon . then about 2.20 went gaigai lor xD.. keep see shoes.. well my nike dunk was pretty old le .. 2 yrs plus think like 3 yrs liao.. its still in quite good condition..
I seriously gonna try e ice cream at e end of city link mall .. it really looks very delicious lor =X.. I tried e ice cream uzumaki le.. not too bad for e green tea flavour.. but e ice cream at city link mall has ALOT of flavours.. -.-.. but one flavour catches my attention .. Mango tiramisu.. sounds like very sweet =/.. quite some time nv had my sinful indulgence of mocha frap wif java chips at STARBUCKS !.. think this days are dam busy wif ndp here n there.. having e booking in blues again.. I tend to sms alot when Im bored -.-.. later when book in I must stop my fingers from smsing sia ._. later hp bills boom again..
I will keep track of my spending tightly so that I wun overspend lor.. faster aug 21st sia.. then I can see my specialist again for the follow up for my knee.. to be frank, I can say both my knees aint doing well =X... abit hai2 to that ba .. think I will end this post here.. getting late le .. cya .. gonna qt then have a nice sleep till 8 ^^
.Monday, July 21, 200812:25 PM
my fb is dying :X.. I not been training it le.. think stopping at 12x e most.. 120 then maybe start a mfs. my items can be used by mfs :X.. kinda save money in a way lolx. later gonna go shopping wif my kaki gabriel ^^.. think I might wanna go arcade to play my fav game : kof maxium impact 2 .. DAM long nv play le lor .. think hopefully can complete game wif 1 credit
I honestly ask myself : was I wrong to say all this? I already apologized to u le but I dunno how u gonna think of me already.. but was it correct that ur besties like tat say me?
(self pondering in e process.)
later dunno wanna have starbucks anot =X.. life to me right now, I will realli think of wat are e impt things to do.. frankly speaking I can say even gotten rid of my depression, I still feel withdrawn at times wif pple.. only those close to me then I wun have tat kind of feeling.. Its something thats dam taunting n hurting when u look back. Its like there still alil residue of the past that still remain in me .. I realli wanna get rid of it.. think alot of pple will nv believe that I did went tru depression. well, I can give a yes to that.. I did went tru depression for 2 yrs.. tat kind of feeling is realli indescribable.. depression is realli something not to joke wif, I went tru it n I can say its realli hurting to be in e process of it.. pple can realli dunno wats going on for tat individual.. but its realli crazy stuff going on for one who is suffering from depression..
think I gonna go bathe now n going out liao .. realli wanna buy some nice accessories later.. how I wish I can be brainwashed so that those images of my past can nv be replayed over n over again. dun think u noe me until u noe wat has happened during those 2 yrs. I realli hope that as time go by, e faith that I have in God will slowly wash e hurtful experiences that I had in those times.. its like at times everyone will go tru dark valleys, but I think mine was total pitch darkness back then.
quote of e day : wats e point of fighting when we lose ourselves? "_
.Saturday, July 19, 20087:35 AM
hehe.. lazzie to blog sia.. last night went cg.. well it was fun ? celebrated someone bdae in e cell.. today gonna help out ndp as usual lor.. but monday no off T.T.. been pushed to friday lor ._. but not too bad ba if u think in a good way gonna makan..bathe then leave hse at 8 =).. hopefully tonight can end early ba .. then tml go for service wif gabriel chun kiat godiva n maybe donald? realli hope today can finish e tasks Im being assigned to.. gambatte to myself :x
think I will write more when I reach hm later ^^..
.Wednesday, July 16, 20087:25 AM
._. last night ended quite ok.. like 10 plus? lolx.. thank God for everything (",). just feel sleepy right now xD.. then 10 need to be at branch later.. jy to myself xD.. hopefully got nights out then I can come out n buy some stuff lor =) .. wasnt anything much to blog about for e helping out.. cos theres ALOT of slacking lor =/
sleepyhead ._. tata
.Monday, July 14, 20088:50 PM
lolx.. today was good.. went to gabriel condo to swim again.. like from 12-2 like tat.. then we even had sauna.. I perspired ALOT.. 65 degree sia xD.. then talked wif michael... well his equips are CRAZY.. lolx.. full set amp n wif deathblow helm n blade =.= e dmge is dam high.. as well for def.. then after it 3 of us went to lot 1 for kfc then arcade.. goodness lor.. times literally FLIES .. then I went hm lor.. saw one stranger indian guy.. hes dam wierd :X
now slacking at hm cos gonna help out at ndp tml .. like tat lor.. Life isnt boring when u got good friends around u =)
.Sunday, July 13, 200811:50 PM
sianed.. last night help out until very late.. 11.30pm for ndp =.=" one word to describe it.. MADNESS. then somemore not feeling well.. today went for service still wif sore throat.. well thank God its getting better..
I like always e latest =.=.. today let gabriel, godiva n chun kiat to wait for me again ... paiseh liao lor
today like not much tings to blog about.. cos Im lazzie xD.. till then
.Saturday, July 12, 20088:15 AM
gtg out xD.. help out at ndp.. gonna bathe now n go le .. zaijian
.Tuesday, July 8, 200810:10 PM
when u run n run towards ur goal but noting been achieved .. Thats wat I am facing right now.. I told my close friends about my prayer requests.. seriously, I am dam stressed up today n I almost cried.. I seriously dunno wat to do.. God I really need ur help >_<..
as e deer pants, so my soul longs for u.
I feel emotionally drained ... (PUSH)
Labels: editted.. (make e mistake cos made this post in a hurry)
.Monday, July 7, 20089:15 PM
hi to my blog :X.. yesterday sunday went to church wif gabriel.. then we going to take 242.. met up wif pple in my cg ^^.. think it is very nice for all of us to go to church together.. me, gabriel, chun kiat, donald, godiva n her cousin n last but not all natalie .. really enjoyed e service like ALOT.. well I got delivered too =).. words cant express e love that God has been consistently showing to me.. I just feel that after e service, I feel totally changed. Rev Mike Connell is really a man of God, one who walks so close n hand in hand wif God. I really want to be in that kind of relationship with God n my christian friends..
After e service, I went to meet up wif my family xD.. psed my cg sia (not purposely de hor) then eat at some chinese restaurant.. e food was normal la.. but e bill comes. $75 .. lolx.. not I pay can liao.. gonna book in like 1 hr time.. realli think tat when life as a nsf, time passes like so fast when u book out.. but when u book in, time is like slowed down so much -.-". eager for the next book out itself.. which I had to endure like
4 days ? "_ dunno wat to say sia.. Really do keep me in prayer . then after meet up wif my family for meal then I go meet my tekong friend ^^.. ming hui aka sgt pang ! .. he hor bring me go to e mlm company he wanted to work at lor.. enyouth.. then listened to his friend gong wei until quite late then I went hm at 11 plus and CABAL !
eod like 2 times like tat.. no good drops.. I really wonder when I gonna have a bike sia.. God pls grant me my prayer requests n this =X.. I dun wanna treat u like a vending machine but it would be nice if my Archzordian is riding in town doing shopping wif a Rw+2 or even better Rw+3 ..
For today, did nothing much lor. went to sgh for awhile then went to meet gabriel.. Met him like 4 plus for swimming.. goodness e pool n environment is nice ^^.. then after e swim its like 6? then went up his place bathe then we see each other char n went for long john at Lot 1 .. then after tat we go hm lor xD.. can realli say things are realli getting better for me .. N I do hope friends around me can be fine too ^^.. I will end here .. tata.. cya in like 4 days time >.<
.Saturday, July 5, 20081:05 AM
=/ cannot go service again cos of someting lor ... abit sianed 1/2.. but gonna jy for it later .. gonna slp n have my qt asap.. zaijian xD
.Wednesday, July 2, 20083:10 AM
mixed feelings I can say.. got 2 more new shirts xD.. my sis bought for me.. think later just gonna lvl once for cabal.. then lvl 115 le =D.. those who wanna play fb.. can do ask me qns. I will be more gladly to advise n to help ^^.. haven do e style up yet lolx..
If you are reading this, I dunno wat to say to u.. you made alot of promises. but none are wat I have been saying.. its like 7 + mths ago .. pls do n go reflect about it.. Its not I dun wanna talk to u.. but its like at times Im sleeping n gaming n u expect me to reply. if u wanna talk, u can always call me wat -.-
later gonna makan wif sis n family.. think eating good styff xD.. then need to have a hair cut.. my hair looks so good now.. seriously e length tat I at least wanted :( wonder hows ahbang doing at tekong.. hope everything is going well for him
e night is young but Im sleeping soon ^^.. tata
